Kirk Girard’s ‘most accurate’ housing element rejected due to inaccuracies–with fascinating update!!

Let's see how the two human cinder blocks unfuck their way out of this one.

Alas and to no one’s surprise, the state of California has declined to certify Humboldt County’s housing element because of its inclusion of thousands of supposedly buildable lots the state determined no one would ever be able to build on.

These include lots in environmentally sensitive areas, lots zoned exclusively for agriculture and lots that would be buildable only if we had an infrastructure much better than the one we actually do have. But our favorite has to be the lots that would be buildable if gravity did not exist, such as the 1,088 lots identified as buildable in–wait for it–Shelter Cove.

Typically, news like this might occasion a bit of frivolity at the expense of the Community Disservices Development Director. But here’s what’s totally unfunny: The state’s rejection of the county’s housing element will automatically result in the forfeiture of millions of dollars in Community Development Block Grants the county would otherwise have received as a matter of course.

We’re talking about money for things we actually need–like affordable housing and necessary infrastructure upgrades–things the same supervisors who signed off on this crap plan claim to care so much about. So that’s nice.

On the bright side, at least we know who to thank.

Fascinating Update: We tried to link to the Times-Standard story–but lo, behold, etc., there isn’t one, at least not online. Is it possible they actually missed this story? Ten different people tell us about it yesterday, and not one gets word to them? Maybe they just forgot to put it online or something. Let’s hope for that. But it says something about their organization that stupid is a best-case scenario. And yes, by the way, we know this isn’t at all fascinating.

99 Responses

  1. Not true— no housing element in humoldt county is or will compliant until hcaog’s numbers are approved by the state. HCAOG is set to finally approve the numbers next week. HCD will not sign off on the RHNA numbers until the end of Janauary. That said, it still looks as if the Element needs some work.

  2. Good work on reading the first paragraph that talks about HCAOG. Then, you know, there are the other five pages that talk about lots declared buildable that in reality are not even close. “Needs some work” is laughably understated. For future reference, it doesn’t do much good to misrepresent the content of a document that is attached for all to read.

  3. Nice try, retry. It’s time to sit back and watch the progs lie. It’s one of their most reliable qualities.

  4. And that’s to say nothing against liars.

  5. Is “unfuck” really a word? If not, it should be.

  6. Not a prog, just telling it like it is. The County’s Element may suck worse than others,but everyone from Trinidad to Rio Dell is in the same noncompliant boat thanks to HCAOG. For future reference get a clue before spouting off like you know what your talking about.

  7. RHNA is only a nacho.

    The woeful housing inventory is the whole enchilada. No beans no rice, no blended margarita with salt….no bueno.

    The problem is that the critics always said the cuisine was short on quality and long on cheese food.

    All the queen’s horses and all the queens kin couldn’t bring Bonnies agenda a win.

    You think SB 375 is a hoot retry….take a good look at the inclusionary housing language….this gets bigger before it gets squished under the big wheels of prevailing (3-2) wisdom’s spin.

    This comes down to a question of integrity and community values…but what the hell do I know.

    I just like palm trees.

  8. The real issue is the pattern of lies…. yes lies, that have worked up until this time. If it works use it! Now Queen Bon Bon and her minion Kirk work their “magic”on this one! An election is on hand, time for a change, a good change…. people who will not abide by this pattern of lies and ignoring the law. Unfortunately we all suffer by their poor decisions, but by 1/1/2011, we will have a new leadership.

  9. Clueless fuck, read the letter, okay? Just read the letter. If you need some help with the big words, give a shout. HCAOG is one paragraph in five pages of inadequacies. You’ll find that information, you know, in the letter.

  10. From the cover letter:

    …the element must still include a complete site inventory analysis and identify adequate sites.

    Not a single mention of HCAOG in the entire cover letter. So let’s revisit, whenever your ego will allow, who it is who doesn’t know what’ he’s talking about.

  11. Oh snap!!

  12. We like palm trees too, dog. Hugs!!

  13. I got 50 bucks Girard tries to say the changes the state is requiring aren’t significant.

    Because it’s totally insignificant to identify adequate sites and then determine if they really are suitable for building.

    Which is what a housing element is in the first place. Basically starting from scratch isn’t really significant, is it?

  14. All the usual names on the cc list

    Kay Backer
    Julie Williams
    Victoria Copeland
    Debbie Provolt
    Robin Pickering Arkley II

  15. Anrgy dumbfuck. Wonder why I know about the HCAOG issue moron??

  16. Angry!

  17. Because you’re Jesus Fucking Christ, or maybe because you read the letter. Who the fuck cares? Everyone knows about the HCAOG issue. No one denies there’s an HCAOG issue. You are denying the other issues, printed in black and white, in an easy-to-read format that even a smug cocksucker like you should be able to get through. But that’s okay. Keep telling us that the letter isn’t true. That’s good. It gives your credibility a boost.

  18. Stupid!

  19. What’s wrong with being a cocknozzle?

    Seriously, though, smug is the worst. It’s like boring. Nobody who actually is boring ever thinks they’re boring. That and he’s wrong. But no need to fight. It’s pretty obvious all on its own.

  20. I think someone ought to unfuck him but good.

  21. Tell him to hang a left to get back to his own blog. Lying is much more popular there.

  22. Unfucking-A to that, brother.

  23. BFD you can read an HCD “your Housing Element sucks and needs more work letter.” The bullshit about millions being lost is laughable. Again, no one’s element is compliant in Humboldt County. They were all due to be certified on August 31, 2009. Congrats on being able to read an HCD letter. HCD is not going to certify anyone’s element until the RHNA numbers are done. That said Girard has an uphill climb with the grocery list he was given by HCD.

  24. You’d have to be a fool to take that bet.

  25. You fuckers have such hard-ons to slam Bon Bon and Girard you can’t even fathom that I’m not a proggie- but can think for myself. You are showing your collective IQs which aint adding up to much!

  26. retry, you’ll notice we said “to no one’s surprise.” Requests by HCD for changes are, as you said, not unusual. But in this case, the requests for changes have been ongoing for almost three months, and the major issues are still entirely unresolved. Also in this case, the changes requested are fundamental, such as identifying adequate sites and providing adequate analyses of them. If Girard doesn’t get it fixed, and it seems highly unlikely that he can, the CDBG money is gone. Laugh if you want, but those are some pretty serious consequences.

  27. And seriously, is there a single person here who has referred to you as a prog? Because I can’t find one. You protest a bit much, no?

  28. He’s been called a clueless fuck, Jesus Fucking Christ, a smug cocksucker, stupid, and maybe a cocknozzle. It’s hard to tell. No one called him a prog, but he’s announced around three times now that he isn’t one. Who knows? Who cares?

  29. That unfucker is totally starting to piss me off. I’m about ready to unfuck him up.

  30. Well A Non a Me I agree and differ.

    It’s not about the lies….. it’s about the arrogance. The arrogance that in some small mind thought it could be accomplished. I will concede that they might well be part of the same thing.

    It took a hellish effort on the part of one crazy lot of affected people to make a singular point. And dang….they made it. The damn thing is an abuse of authority and that same arrogance will carry into a bevy of new and lingering spins.

    It doesn’t stop here…it only begins here.

    Just like Kerrigan on the pipe or in it….there is always a plausible excuse…..er explanation. Uncharacterized, non native species only last so long…palm trees are forever.

    Supplemental Interim Remedial Action Plan dogs….don’t hunt.

    They just piss on every tree.

    Now…Bugs…. about that masthead…..

  31. The unrealistice preferred land use alternative is coming back to haunt em. I know I sound like a broken record but, the HCAOG hearing may get interesting next week. I predict Girard will pull stunts there to save his Element the expense of others.

  32. We wouldn’t put anything past him, friend. Keep us posted.

  33. Yes??

  34. Well my friend it should be obvious by now

  35. The palm trees?

  36. I beg to differ- HCD previously committed to conditionally certify the Element pending the outcome of the RHNA process, as long as the element was otherwise compliant.

    Notice the lack of the words certify or conditionally certify in the letter.

    This is as close to “nice try” as you are going to get from a political appointee.

  37. “The most accurate land inventory in the state”

    These words will haunt him.

    Out of touch, ya’ think?

    Kirk, if you are reading this, I recommend starting with the basics= http://www.hcd.ca.gov/hpd/housing_element2/index.php

    The rest of us learned this at the HCD workshop in Eureka that you blew off for your vacation to France, right?

    Adieu!

  38. …….A Bonnied palm tree, with Girard coconut heads festooned with currency

    Lot ‘s of Kerrigsand fleas and Mark in love’s lace with a Lei made up of Fausts, faux beard hairs. Peter Douglas on a fully characterized surfboard in the background That would not be complete without a dog…Pissing on the tree.

    It rivals Camus

    But, as always…just a thought

  39. But if the Graphics Department wants a difficult challenge….let me know

  40. You said it well. The attitude of if it works, use it has been the pattern for the past. If we just step back and look at the mess we are in we can see the HCAOAG failure due to inept leadership, more time at the bar than at work, and our Planning staff’s agenda pushing and more than sloppy work … here we are now with local necessary projects unfunded. Heads should roll, but will they? This is why we need new leadership at the top. New faces in the 4th and 5th! Clendennen will be under pressure because of his only 38% election. There should be a change there also. Bon Bon’s empire is crumbling, change is in the air, all for the good.

  41. With Bonnie having to worry so much about her own seat, how can have time to shove Cleary down our throats in the 5th? This empire needs to end.

  42. You bet your sweet biffy!

  43. Holy crap, dog. Those bastards would have to sober up for that. What are you thinking?

  44. Girard’s already started in with the no-big-deal bullshit. But it doesn’t matter anyway. His job performance has never been relevant to his continued employment. Neely, to whom he owes his existence, is all but gone, and it remains to be seen if his suck-up skills are transferable to a new master. Honestly, he’s never not fucked up anything he’s come into contact with. He knows it. Everyone knows it. He’s a useles sycophantic waste of $125,000 + every year–good enough money to get someone with a brain, but no. We get that dumb pile of crap instead. Thanks, Bon Bon!

  45. 1088 units in shelter cove is laugh out loud bullshit. fewer then 10 would pass environmental review. maybe girard was hoping the state was as easy to dupe as the electorate that keeps his dominatrix employed.

  46. What I hate most about Neely is that she doesn’t have a single value or position or belief. She never has. She will do anything to advance her own career. Anything. She was elected a Republican, and was a pretty consistent one until the political demographics of her district shifted. Then suddenly she was a moderate. Then a dem. Now a prog. She doesn’t believe any of it. She doesn’t even care about any of it. It’s pure power politics, with self preservation as the ultimate goal. Because of that, I suspect she, like some mangy-assed cat, will land on her feet.

  47. Kirk Girard is arrogant, stupid and just got caught with his pants down. Not a pretty sight, and I wish he would at least turn around and hide his junk. Then we could throw darts at his ass. Bonnie, Girard and the county council have openly defied the work of people who actually knnow what they are talking about – like the Northern California Association of Builders, the Humboldt Association of Realtors and others who deal with land issues as part of their activities. And who have to appear before the above named assholes to have plans denied or amended or generally fucked with. King Kirk must be dragged trhough the streets and then flogged. Only that would make me happy.

  48. Yeah, you’re right phart’, Real Estate professionals and Builder/Developers would act in the best interests of the County

    Even the most astute observer wouldn’t be able to find a conflict of interest given that scenario

  49. Moron – they might just know because that is what they deal in. Land use planning, zoning issues, etc. WTF do you do that gives you insight to those issues?

  50. Conflict of interest? Naw…

  51. So if you need a good auto mechanic, you would ask your florist? How about that car salesman – he might actually know more than you. You may not hold him is high esteem, but he still knows more than you. Lose your prejudice and go with those in the know. they are not evil people, Kirk, BonBon and the county coucil are the enemy here.

  52. BRILLIANT!!!!!!!!!!

  53. Maybe not this time — cats only have nine lives…if she does land , pray that it be in Siberia

  54. Only good if Bon Bon were there dragged and flogged too.

  55. Why is it that just because Builders follow the law and tell the truth to do what they do makes them evil or in conflict of interest?

    Somebody had to have build the home that 10:19 and 10:40 lives in (or under). Obviously because you are not of the character to be creative enough to build anything, much less to building code standards, or be honest enough to apply for a permit to allow you to build it which calls for you to have the moral strength to go through a public hearing because you intend to live up to always ‘doing the right thing’ to make a living.

    The conflict here is not with the builders or the realtors. They are licensed to do what they do – you are just pathetic smarm – wandering endlessly to find some religion without believing in God. Good luck with that.

  56. BINGO

  57. I suppose that HCD “doesn’t always get it right”. Perhaps Kirk can show us how they are wrong and he is right….

    We’re waiting.

  58. Kirko is gonna try skull fuck ( with the help of Lovelace or Cliffy) Eureka, Fortuna, and Arcata into taking the housing numbers he can’t produce.

  59. Uh, didn’t Kirk read the memo? Their appeal period has expired.

    Also, each of those jurisdictions gets a vote, and the County only gets one. Why would they further delay their Housing Elements just because the County got cought overstating their land inventory?

    What a pity!

  60. California Government Code Section 65584.05 (f) – The Council of Governments SHALL [emphasis added] issue a proposed final allocation with 45 days of the completion of the 60-day period for hearing appeals.

  61. Where is the Times-Standard on this story? Its silence is screaming.

  62. Say WHAT – I think I love you…

  63. Unfuckingbelievable.

  64. Not only does Bonnie’s pending “retirement” [cough] put Kirk in serious jeopardy [dead man walking], but what about poor Clendenen? Now how will he know what to vote for?

    Once the umbilical cord is cut, can Marky-Mark sew it back onto himself?

    More importantly, will Clif still be around come 2011? 38% looks like a large number compared to his job approval ratings!

  65. Cliffy will then have to openly have is nose up Elizabeth Conor’s ass…disgusting image – but true – she is paid by the Bonster to talk to Cliffy every day and tell him BonBon’s bidding….

  66. And who at Wealthy Humboldt decided it was a good idea to put that bat-shit Connors on payroll? She’s useless, unless you’re into freak shows.

  67. Clif + Mark Truelove 4ever…Those two are going to lobby the state for a smart growth solution to their Planning Director’s inability to write a housing element. Smart as in shove it all into eureka.

  68. She is the mother vampire for the lot.

  69. Here are our top stories for the day:

    1) A reorganization plan for General Growth who owns the Bayshore Mall. We thought it would be a nice touch to actually include in the headline that there are no local impacts, so you could just jump to something relevant:

    2) A local soldier’s take on Obama’s Afghan strategy to deploy 30,000 more soldiers to that Godforsaken hell hole.

    3) An ACLU initiative spearheaded by the Eureka City Council dynamic duo Linda Atkins and Larry Glass, which would change the city’s election to a true ward system, where members would be elected to serve by residents of the ward they represent. Glass must be really pissed because he was promised a much higher placement of this story on the Web and on the print copy.

    4) A nine-sentence “story” about a memo from HSU chief to students about ongoing budget woes. Hey, at least reporter Allison White got a quote from the university. Yay. I am sure no students were available to comment. They are probably all to busy prepping for finals or doing bong rips in the dorms.

    5) A 3-sentence “story” about KHSU wanting input on its programming. Zzzzzzzz.

    So, you see that we would have written about the County’s Housing Element being rejected by the state, but Bonnie Neely didn’t give James Faulk the go ahead on that one.

  70. I guess that the T-S does not deem a story regarding the County to be “news” unless nd until Bonnie says that it is “news.” What an independent and impartal press we have.

  71. Yes! I’m comment number 69.

    Speaking of sucking, when is Kirk’s next performance evaluation.

    But seriously, this topic has generated much more interest than most of your other posts. You guys are the go-to place for local news.

  72. I’d be careful with that, Real. You know for the most part we just make shit up. It’s not news, per se, but it’s a hell of a lot more fun.

  73. Did he just say “seriously”? On this site? I need a drink.

  74. Did someone say drink? We might be in love.

  75. Don’t forget McKinleyville – he wants to make every development cram as many houses onto smaller than postage stamp parcels – he wants future slums (he and Mark call that “infill,” Bonnie calls it “smarth growth,” Mark’s income depended on his pushing “infill” and that’s the reason he attended all those meetings, not out of the goodness of his heart, we now know.

    They like to run on caring about the “quality of life” we have always had here in Humboldt, but they are about destroying it.

    They like to say it is the developers who are going for maximum density, but if you talk to some of them at least, they want larger lot sizes and larger houses – they want people to have room for horses and gardens, maybe a lawn their kids can play volleyball and football on. And buyers would like that too.

    But the “Progressive” agenda imposes more and more costs and fees, and expensive delays, so in addition to their demands for “infill” the developer is forced to go for more parcels just to pay for the agenda.

    In McKinleyville, we don’t want to be the dumping ground – we don’t want Ken Miller’s vision of cramming all the people into a small space, while he has his eyes on the timber lands. For what? Growing pot? Or is it big developments of his own. Guess we’ll have to wait and see.

  76. Perhaps this is an apporpriate place to draw attention to the new development being green-lighted by the City of Arcata.

    To quote the erudite, councilmember, Shane Brinton, “This really looks and feels like all those developments I keep hearing about at workshops I go to.”

    Lets us pause to absorb the impact of that statement….

    OK, pause over, I think at this juncture, perhaps Mr. Girard is not attending the best workshops. It would, perhaps, be to his benefits to attend the same ones’ that Shane does……of course putting these two together could quickly lead to a supernova of stupidity.

    This taxpayer wonders if the oh-so-astute Mr. Brinton is attending said workshops on the public nickel? He better stay OUT of the hotel bar, I don’t think he is old enough to drink yet, which certaintly rules out an exclusive story for the Bugs.

  77. Why don’t we just do what Sacramento did and turn the Community Development Department over to developers? Then they can overbuild and go bankrupt ….. like they did in Sacramento.

  78. Rose

    A thoughtful and insightful piece and I agree wholeheartedly. Mr. Proggie, (see below) lumps all developers in the evil pot, but one can see, by example that at least they follow the rules, which is more, so much more than you can say for those “forward thinking individuals.”

  79. Naw, Proggie, we’ll just turn it over to you – people are starting to get a glimpse of what that might mean – now that the Pulp Mill has been driven out, and the mills are closed, and jobs are gone – without the pulp mill not only do you have no jobs, you have higher water bills to bear – it was all kinda subsidized by a healthy working economy, and now it’s – NOT.

    Gonna get worse, too. And what do the Proggies’ have to offer? Ummmmmmm, let’s see………….. there’s, um…….. well………… lemme think………… jobs, no……. ummmmmmmmmm, hmmm, welll, zip, zero, nada. Lotsa flowery rhetoric and pretending to be centrist/conservative in order to get elected.

  80. No please, let’s not change anything because the system’s working super good the way it is.

  81. cliffy to a T

  82. I have every confidence in their abilities impaired or illuminated……or both. At least the raw materials are there. Only the genius…or genus awaits.

  83. Kayaks, Rose, think kayaks. And trails. Those two by themselves will turn this local economy around like a, humm, aaahh, help me out here progressives……

  84. Dear Humboldt Mirror Readers,

    There appears to be some misunderstanding about the relative significance of the Housing Element.

    What you may not know is that the Housing Element is but one Chapter in the overall General Plan for the County.

    Staff has complete confidence that by the time the remainder of the General Plan is adopted we will have worked out the “technicalities” referenced in the letter from HCD. That date is presently estimated to be July 1, 2080, although I admit that may slip by a few decades.

    If it makes you feel any better, I’ll write you a check out of my secret account.

    Furthermore, spin, spin, spin, lie, lie, lie.

    Sincerely,

    Girk

  85. Proggies offer obstruction to development!

  86. Proggies offer obstruction to progress. I hope you see the irony.

  87. Consider it canis envy

  88. Who give a shit about any of this nonsense

    Oregon won the Civil War and is headed to the Rose Bowl!

  89. I like how “progs” are the Emmanuel Goldsteins’ of conservatives (or what the opposite of prog is…gorp?). It would unfuck this whole blog if there was no terrorists.

  90. From the story in today’s Times-Standard :

    “The state, however, seems to back the county’s position. According to state officials, the county is following the state’s review process.”

    This dispute has been going on for years. Sacramento resident Kay Backer tosses out some rhetoric, but in the end the state always sides with Humboldt County. There is nothing new here that I can see.

  91. The State cover letter is just velvety rhetoric. Go beyond and look at the attachments. The County is dead in the water for years on its element.
    Don’t look for the County and State to say this or for the T-S to report it, but the substance is that the dollars are gone.

  92. “but the substance is that the dollars are gone.”

    What does this mean? Can you cite one instance the county has lost HCD assistance dollars or grant funds because the county’s Housing Element was out of compliance?

    My point is that there is nothing new here. The County submits its Housing Element. The State finds a few deficiencies. Kay Backer denounces Kirk Girard. The County corrects the deficiencies to the State’s satisfaction. The State certifies the Element. Backer complains. Life goes on. This has been happening for years. Let me know if anything changes.

  93. the element is either “certified” or not. these are not a few deficiencies. proggie, do you think it is reasonable we should assume 200 dwelling units per year will be built in Shelter Cove for the next five years?

  94. Thanks for clearing it all up, Girk. Hugs!!

  95. What’s different, Proggie, is that this was not a soft target. It is or it isn’t certififed, and it is not certified. And what it will take to get it certified is basically start from scratch. A Housing Element is the identification and evaluation of buildable lots. The deficiencies in this Housing Element, according to the HCD, are the failure to identify and evaluate buildable lots. In other words, this is a complete do-over.

    Obviously what hasn’t changed is a prog’s ability to explain away even the most overt evidence of incompetence in our planning department. That and Bonnie Neely are what have allowed this to continue all these years. Thanks.

  96. There won’t be any if the current trend continues, every development gets blocked at every turn – but look, do you really want all new development to cater to the lowest common denominator? Do you really want only crammed together future slums, with front yards that aren’t even big enough to park a car on? Did we stay here and move here to have it turned into the city? With houses that share a common wall or have a foot between them? Concrete everywhere? That;s what infill is, and it locks people into a life where they cannot ever be self sufficient, cannot ever grow their own food, much less raise chickens, cows, sheep, horses, etc., a life where they are dependent on Safeway.

    It ain’t anybody’s idea of a dream home or something to aspire to.

    It’s not up to the State to provide housing for people. But that’s a larger problem yet. This idea that the State is mandating certain numbers and dictating what a landowner can build and provide – it;’s a bad idea and it is costing this County alot. Just one more factor in why the State is going down the tubes and people are fleeing.

  97. [...] read the correspondence from Sacramento yet, but the ever-so-repressed Humboldt Mirror has plenty to say about it.  If the Mirror is correct, the housing plan detractors were correct in their predictions that the [...]

  98. THE SKY IS FALLING!!!

    WATCH OUT BELOW!!!

  99. Being a home owner on a much smaller scale I came upon this site & am very surprised to find out that Kirk is actually my enemy in my delema of me losing my privacy of where my home/lot is. I am realizing that his support of this zero density lot crap has just stripped me of my privacy just because some one wants to pass some crap to get $. This gain is at my lost. No care of ambience privacy that I had. I feel very taken advantage of & didn’t matter that I spoke my objection @ the planning hearings. Thre was an agenda to keep & it was kept. Who cares about me?

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