Grand Jury finds EPD failed to follow own policies in handling ‘report of wrongdoing which may have involved an elected official’

Damn shame we have absolutely no idea what that’s about, isn’t it?

The Grand Jury concluded that although the Eureka Police Department handled the unexplained matter “without following what little protocol their own manual contains,” and that one “member of the EPD” said it “wasn’t that important” for existing protocols to be followed in this case, “nothing was illegally done” by the department.

The same is not said for the elected official.

Ah, vindication, yes? Sometimes it smells an awful lot like teen spirit.

Read the entire 2011 Grand Jury report here.

Eight former Eureka mayors and councilmembers kick Linda Atkins’ ass

Once in a while, Times-Standard employees put something absolutely riveting in the pages of their newspaper.

Almost never did they write it themselves.

Today’s example of both is a guest opinion piece submitted by former city of Eureka representatives Mike Jones, Jeff Leonard, Virginia Bass, Mary Beth Wolford, Polly Endert, Cherie Arkley, Connie Miller and Nancy Flemming, who call out current Councilwoman Linda Atkins for some of her more colorful contributions to local mythology.

One of our faves:

In a recent North Coast Journal article, Councilwoman Atkins also blamed the city manager for turnover in city department heads. We know many of these department heads personally, so we did something the writer of the NCJ story did not. We called four former city employees and asked why they left. Not one of them said it was because of Tyson. These four did however allude to a former city councilmember who created havoc within the city by acting as if he was dictator — not one of five elected city councilmembers. Misstating the truth is not high on the list of political qualities that voters admire.

Gosh! Now who might that have been?

Read the letter in its entirety here.

Sixteen (Roman) Candles

Fireworks in hand, Larry still needed to pick up some wine coolers and "Twilight" DVDs before his guests arrived.

The Biggest Loser

Bill the Chump

Even though it’s still a sore subject over at the Big Hammer headquarters, it’s worth mentioning again which local millionaire shelled out the dough in November’s election.

The November election showed that big donations don’t always guarantee a win in Eureka. Bill and Elizabeth Pierson filed a major donor expenditure statement, indicating they donated $44,000 to five candidates in 2010. Three of those were to Eureka candidates — Larry Glass, Ron Kuhnel and LaVallee — all of whom were not elected.

We’d put Pierson’s numbers easily over $100,000 if you start adding up the cash going back to the 2006 supervisorial and Eureka City Council races too.

There is one bright spot for Bill, though. Former Eureka Mayor Peter LaVallee announced recently that he’d returned a $1,000 contribution to Pierson–chump change for the hardware baron but a nice enough gesture from LaVallee, who at least went down with some dignity.

Bayshore Best Buy?

As previously tweeted by capdiamont, rumors abound that the electronics superstore Best Buy has inked an agreement to open a retail outlet in the Bayshore Mall.

While there has been no official announcement yet (and we’re wrong about most things), it’s never too early for the progs to bang on about how the world will end, and the rest of us to hope the move would give a bit of a boost to our local economy and breathe some life into our sad little half-empty mall.

Oh and Larry Glass: Are there to be any historical re-enactments in your future? Just remember Davy. The other guys win.

But then you’re probably getting used to that by now.

Three Stooges to make rare radio appearance

You do not want to miss this.

KSLG’s charity event Friday at the Eureka Co-Op will include interviews with three of the county’s biggest knob-jobs–one in power, one out, and one holding on for dear life while his well-worn resume is passed over by every cop shop in Northern California.

According to a KSLG media alert, the schedule is as follows:

8:45am Eureka Police Chief Garr Neilsen will provide a state of the city roundup.

9:45am Former Eureka City Councilman Larry Glass will talk about his time in office.

10:20am Humboldt County DA Paul Gallegos will be on to discuss the recent election and his plans for the future.

Maybe those plans include a major three-way in the parking lot of the Eureka Co-op.

Which would be business as usual for them.

Tune in to 94.1 FM to hear their slap and tickle routine for yourself.

‘Nothing is more dangerous than a man with nothing to lose.’

Coming to some lame guerilla street theater shit near you.

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