In a blatant and successful attempt at upstaging its largest creditor group, the bankrupt Pacific Lumber Company announced Wednesday that it has appointed lovable Winnie the Pooh to run the company as it transitions from bankruptcy protection.
Earlier in the day, representatives of the timber note holders, who are owed a gazillion dollars by the company, named the much less popular former California Governor Pete Wilson to head up reorganization efforts for their plan, which stands little chance of being approved.
“If you’re going to have a reorganization plan figurehead, you really can’t do any better than Mr. Pooh,” said Palco attorney Frank Bacik. “He’s universally beloved, he has his own theme song, and he’s never worked for Richard Nixon.”
But both Palco and the note holders may be trumped by the expected announcement of a third post-bankruptcy plan mascot to represent the holier-than-thou plan put forth by Marathon, a secured creditor, and the Mendocino Redwood Company.
Sources close to Marathon and MRC have hinted privately that their transition team would be led by the Lord God Almighty, with Son of God and MRC Chairman Sandy Dean filling in on Sundays.
All three proposed plan agents have extensive timber management experience.
Pooh, a tubby little cubby all stuffed with fluff, worked for many years in the 100-Acre Wood. Wilson played a minor role in the much-despised 1999 Headwaters Agreement, and God created trees.
Pooh called his appointment “absolutely, positively splendiferous.”
Filed under: Humboldt County | Tagged: battle of the post-bankruptcy plan mascots, Mendocino Redwood Company, Sneaky Pete and Tricky Dick, The Pacific Lumber Company, willy nilly silly old bear, Winnie the Pooh |