Second and Third District candidates for the Humboldt County Board of Supervisors showed off their verbal wizardry Thursday at a competitive poetry jam attended by hundreds of potential voters.
But the event, sponsored by the League of Women Poets, wasn’t all fun and games.
The poetry jam raised almost a dollar for the Perpetual Campaign to Continuously Re-elect Bonnie Neely, which was apparently in need of both an envelope and a stamp so that the six-term supervisor could at long last respond to Third District candidate Bryan Plumley’s request for a meeting.
But it was another Third District candidate, Paul Pitino, who walked off with the event’s grand prize for this piece:
And no campaign endorsements
Maybe not so smart”
League President Marsha McBusybody called all of the haiku “powerful,” but said Pitino’s was especially moving.
“Like all great art, Paul’s work was transcendent,” McBusybody said. “In a very few words, we were made to understand the smallness of man, the vastness of his ambition and the vividly distinct possibility that Paul Pitino will mow lawns for a living until the day he dies.”
The other electoral haiku are listed below in alphabetical order by the candidate’s last name.
I love Indians
Local Solutions bought me
Blue Lake paid the bill
-Clif Clendenen, Second District
Seventy thousand a year
Buys a lot of weed
-Estelle Fennell, Second District
Need a real job
Plan B is running Palco
I’d suck at that too
-Mark Lovelace, Third District
What sets me apart?
A Democrat with a job
Rare in Arcata
-Bryan Plumley, Third District
Hey you two-bit whores
Want to talk about apples?
Mine are fucking huge
-Roger Rodoni, Second District
Filed under: Humboldt County Tagged: | biggest apples in the county, Bon Bon hates Plumley so we love him, Bryan Plumley, Clif Clendenen, electoral haiku, Estelle Fennell, evidently "haiku" is the plural of "haiku", Mark Lovelace, only award Pitino has ever won, Paul Pitino, Roger Rodoni, the whole thing was rigged