Sequoia Springs Senior Living is holding a sweepstakes that will award one winner with free room and board for a year.
Like in a Senior Living facility. In Fortuna. With old people and the faint but inescapable smell of Lysol and urine.
No, that’s the prize.
Not exactly a million dollars and a trip around the world. We wonder if even Fred will enter this one.
The news release goes on to state that two runner-ups will be beaten with pimp-sticks until tender, then cut neatly in half and served with a side of canned peas.
Okay, we made that last part up.