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Woman’s claim not to have slept with Herman Cain unravels

Eek! Hold the sausage.

Former Godfather’s Pizza CEO Herman Cain, who briefly led as the Republican presidential hopeful, announced this weekend that he suspended his rapidly failing campaign amid a flurry of new and ongoing sexual scandal allegations.

A 91-year-old woman and resident at the Sunrise Senior Living facility in Atlanta vehemently denied accusations on Sunday that she too had slept with Cain last month. Despite her claims of innocence, she and Cain were unable to account for a suspicious 15-minute window of opportunity when his motorcade arrived late for a fundraiser approximately .2 miles away from her retirement home.

On Saturday Cain vowed “not to go away,” which prompted women and senior living officials across several states in the South to step up security measures in and around their homes.