Local progs mobilize to celebrate Earth Day in record numbers

The Humboldt Mirror hotline was annoyingly abuzz Sunday and early into Monday morning with information about weird Earth Day happenings around the area. According to an independent analysis, there were more than a few interesting and provocative 2012 Earth Day activities in and around Humboldt County this year. Let’s suffice it to say that tree-hugging was sooooooo 1980s. This year it was all about…

Photo credit to Prime Buyer's Report.

1) Open mouth kissing a tree (with a little heavy petting.)  Whoooooo hooooooo!

2) Growing marijuana by eco-groovy rechargeable battery-powered lights.

3) Converting to Amish Mennonites and churning some tasty vegan Pennsylvanian-style gluten-free butter.

4) Transforming Kim Starr to an alternative energy source. Because even the Progs can’t stand that crazy bitch.

5) Erecting interpretive signage and having docent-lead tours through the 386 homeless camps in the Palco Marsh in Eureka.


15 Responses

  1. Lucky tree.

  2. Was this picture preapproved by the Tree Rights Protection Group?Was this taken in Richardson’s Grove? Sure looks like one of those “Trans” trees destined to get cut.
    Is it possible to transmit herpes to a tree from oral labialsation? How can you french kiss these Humboldt honnies when they have lip slivers? Yuk! Pic would have been better in the buff.

  3. What the hell is wrong with Kim Starr/Whateverherhippie/moonchild/earthtardessname? Honestly, I’m surprised nobody has raised “COINTELPRO” against her….. because maybe nobody could figure out who benefits from her poop flinging?

  4. Wow…that is one hot ecoMomma. A crack concerning wood comes to mind, but I digress…

  5. Is that Verbena in the picture?

  6. Kiss me for I am tree……

  7. Rumor is Atkins is going to quit after Walmart is open because any more effort is a waste of time.

  8. Hummm….
    Frenching trees: barking up the wrong one there
    Growing dope: boorring!
    Vegan butter; fat-free oxy for moron’s
    Verbena: over-weight, , over-exposed, over patchouli(ed), under-washed
    Erect signage: a home run on that one Bugs!

  9. How clever of you Bugs

    You managed to obtain a classified photo of the Epic rescue squad preparing to perform the Heimlich Maneuver on Old growth redwoods after the devastation of air spade root protection inflicted by Caltrans at Richardson’s Grove.

    I too have obtained intel on this. The photo above depicts Ken Miller in his latest disguise sucking the Walmart political influence out of the tree sap.

    As you may recall, I do have a certain affection for trees. And yes, palm trees are the most intelligent sentient life-sharing forms on the planet. As such, they regularly speak with their sister trees. (all trees are female if, of course there were some gender discrimination, which there is not.) To put it indelicately, they are really getting impatient with the tree huggers. Not because they don’t enjoy a hug but because the hugging has nothing to do with their well being.

    However, Archie, my buddy palm from Bermuda does report that many of the redwoods do appreciate the attention only because it gives the dull and ignorant among the humans a safe place to occupy themselves while long, slow evolution brings them to a point of sophistication where they may not need protests, crises and causes to feel important.

    To quote Archie, “If they are so concerned about growth, then let them say that ,instead of trying to swap spit with us. Trees, by nature have a rather special interest in growth. Hell those silly bastards are more engangered than any of us.”

    Archie is not unknown for being outspoken among the palms.

  10. Again my sweet Josephine, we are in synch.

  11. So Bugs

    Why don’t we have a post about Verbosa….er Verbena. Should be a lively discussion. Lot’s of material to work with.

  12. Verbena could use a visit to a dentist

  13. Anybody see the pictures of her cursing Dennis Mayo outside the Ingomar Club. It was during the republican dinner few Saturdays back. He took a tray of shrimp out to her group protesting and she went off. She is a bigger bitch than Plain Jane or Mitch.

  14. I think PJ’s real initials are MB

  15. she’s crazed from lackof pizza !

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