Meanwhile, in the Fifth District, democracy breathes its last

Patrick Cleary, the man who would be chief.

A couple of e-mails purporting to originate from the amply fed bowels of Team Cleary state that the popular District Five candidate is “in a state of shock and disbelief” over his crap election results.

Says one: “None of us can figure out how you hire the kind of professional management we had and lose that badly to someone managed by Mostranski. And then there’s the other Pat. Even Higgins’ friends don’t like him and he may end up nosing out Cleary.”

The numbers, say another, have Cleary “rethinking politics altogether.”

Because, yeah. When people can’t move here from New York and use their daddy’s investment banking money to buy their way into elective office, is nothing sacred anymore?

Higgins throws monstrously oversized hat in the ring for supervisor

Being smug never felt so good.

In other batshit crazy news this week we almost forgot to mention, narcissistipsycho Patrick Higgins has announced he’s running for 5th District Supervisor. Higgins currently serves as northern Humboldt County’s representative on the Humboldt Bay Harbor, Recreation and Conservation District. Higgins chairs the Harbor District’s Pompous Asshole Committee, Obnoxious Asshole Committee and the Can We Please Steer the Conversation to Include Talking About Me Committee.

Among the qualifications Higgins is touting as the reason voters in the McKinleyville, Trinidad, Blue Lake, Hoopa, Orick,  and Willow Creek areas should check his box come polling time include talking about fish incessantly, being loud, and being smug at a breathtaking level.